Mental Health After Online Hate: What Helps Now

Online hate affects your mental health, even if it was “only” written. A comment is typed in seconds, but it stays in your head. Many people affected sleep badly, check their phone constantly or withdraw. This article explains which reactions are common, what can help you and when you should get support. It gives general information and does not replace advice from a doctor or psychotherapist.

If you are thinking about self-harm or suicide right now: talk to someone now. The Telefonseelsorge (a free, anonymous crisis line in German) is available around the clock on 0800 111 0 111, 0800 111 0 222 or 116 123. In acute danger, call the emergency number 112.

How does online hate affect your mental health?

Online attacks often feel worse than outsiders think. They follow you home, into bed, onto your way to school. They are public, and you do not know who has read them. And they do not stop just because you put your phone down.

How common this is was shown by the study “Lauter Hass – leiser Rückzug” (Loud Hate – Quiet Retreat; Kompetenznetzwerk gegen Hass im Netz, 2024), which surveyed more than 3,000 internet users aged 16 and over in Germany: almost one in two (49 per cent) had been insulted online. More than half said that, out of fear, they express their political opinion online less often (57 per cent) and take part in discussions less often (55 per cent).

Mental health after online hate: common reactions

People react differently. Those affected report, for example:

• Racing thoughts: the comment replays in your head again and again, even at night.
• Constant checking: you look every few minutes to see whether something new has come in.
• Anxiety and restlessness: especially when threats or your address are involved.
• Shame: even though you did nothing wrong; the person attacking you did.
• Anger or exhaustion: sometimes both on the same day.
• Withdrawal: you stop posting and avoid group chats or friends.
• Physical complaints: for example poor sleep, headaches or stomach aches.

These are common reactions to a stressful situation. They do not mean something is wrong with you. Responsibility for the attack lies with whoever attacks. Not with you.

What can help in the first few days

Tell someone. A friend, your parents, a teacher or the school social worker. You do not have to carry this alone.

Let someone else secure the evidence. Evidence matters, but you do not have to read every comment yourself. Ask someone you trust to take screenshots and save links for you. How that works is explained in How to Secure Evidence of Online Hate.

Do not reply. A reply gives the attackers what they want: your attention. It can make things worse.

Take back control. Small steps can bring relief: reporting, blocking after securing evidence, filing a criminal complaint. But you do not have to do any of it right away. Which order makes sense is shown in What to Do About Hate Comments: 5 Concrete Steps.

Look after the basics. Sleep, eat, go outside, meet people who are good for you. It sounds trivial. Under stress, though, it is often the first thing to go.

Digital breaks: distance without giving up

Taking a break from the internet is not retreating from the attackers. It is self-protection. And it does not mean you have to delete everything.

• Turn off notifications for the app or chat where the attacks happen.
• Limit comments: many platforms offer word filters, restricted comments or hiding messages from unknown accounts. Check the privacy settings.
• Make your account private or pause it instead of deleting it. Deleting may destroy evidence.
• Set times: only check your phone at certain times, and not in bed.
• Someone as a filter: another person checks for you whether anything important has come in.

Always secure evidence before you delete content, block accounts or deactivate your account.

When should you get help?

Getting help is always allowed, not only when things are “bad enough”. Support is especially important if

• the strain does not ease for weeks,
• you sleep badly, hardly eat, or school, training or work suffer,
• you withdraw from everyone,
• you use alcohol or other substances to cope,
• you think about self-harm or about not wanting to live any more. Then get help immediately.

If you are being threatened and feel in danger, call the police on 110.

Where you can get support

• Telefonseelsorge: 0800 111 0 111, 0800 111 0 222 or 116 123, around the clock, free and anonymous. Also by chat and email.
• Nummer gegen Kummer: helpline for children and young people on 116 111, Monday to Saturday, 2 pm to 8 pm. On Saturdays, young people advise young people. Parents can call the parents' helpline (Elterntelefon) on 0800 111 0 550. More at nummergegenkummer.de.
• JUUUPORT: young people advise young people on online problems, confidentially and free of charge, at juuuport.de.
• HateAid: counselling for people affected by digital violence.
• Hilfetelefon Gewalt gegen Frauen (helpline for violence against women): 116 016, around the clock, anonymous and free of charge, in many languages, also for digital violence and for family and friends.
• Medical and psychotherapeutic help: your GP or paediatrician is a good first place to go. People with statutory health insurance can get an appointment for an initial psychotherapy consultation (psychotherapeutische Sprechstunde) through the patient service 116117. You do not need a referral for this.

For parents and friends: how to support someone

Listen without judging. Sentences like “Then just stay offline” feel like a punishment to the person affected. Ask what they need right now. Offer to secure the evidence so they do not have to read the content again. Watch for the warning signs above and help them contact a support service. What parents can do in concrete terms is described in Child Bullied Online? What Parents Can Do Now.

Frequently asked questions

Is it normal that a single comment affects me so much?

Yes. Even a single attack can hit hard, especially if it is public or concerns something personal. That is not a weakness but a common reaction.

Should I delete my account?

Not in a hurry. If you delete your account, you may lose evidence. A private or paused account creates distance without losing anything.

Who can I call at night?

The Telefonseelsorge is available around the clock, free and anonymous: 0800 111 0 111, 0800 111 0 222 or 116 123. In acute danger, dial 112.

Does filing a criminal complaint help with the strain?

Some people find it a relief to take action. You decide when you are ready. Note, however: for insults, the request for prosecution (Strafantrag) must be filed within three months.

Report your case

If you want to take legal action against the attacks, you can report it through our form. If you say yes, your report goes automatically to a suitable cooperating law firm (Kooperationskanzlei) as soon as one is available. If there is no suitable firm right now, you get an email with other places to turn to straight away. Deadlines keep running: you can always file a request for prosecution (Strafantrag) with the police yourself. The legal assessment comes from the law firm, not from us. For your mental health, the services listed above are there for you.